Social Attentionalism

June 3, 2011

Note: this is a 'Blue-Sky Thinking' proposal of mine for a sociological study and a podcast will follow. Weblink Info: Examples of Historical Blue Sky Thinking.

The world gives its attention to everyone in society. FACT. Thats the way it is, when you born, there are people surrounding you, including the spiritual realm and when you depart from this world, attention will be placed on your life in hindsight. And any attention draws attention, its noticable. FACT. There is no escape, even when you're not there, you leave behind something always.

For attention is the first instance and a subtle means of any type of communication, as a drawing out (from the mind) and pointing out (the spoken words) along with any visual gestures (the pointing of a finger, the indication of a nod, the glance of an eye) as an aid to a function that is part and parcel of life that is conducted on a day to day basis, as the attention span formulates the message that it wants to convey, for example in a lecture given by a professor or a public speaker and both for social reasons and commercial interests.

But all attention is never equal that is inborn with people, as there seems to be four different kinds of people regardless of gender or social conditioning, with degrees of attentional traits within them:

The attention seeker - well documented and known about, the abhorrent of many; whether its justified or not?

The reluctant attentioner - these people try and avoid any attention given to them, but work mainly behind the scenes, and chose not to be helped along by it in self-promotion, so don't participate much in society, much to their impediment because the world gives its attention all the time and its called networking, as sometimes you have to be noticed for the right reasons, as they like to function under 'it was brought to my attention' mode. Hence the;

The attention givers - they will give a certain amount of time and attention in a nurturing/critical way to those within their focus and/or to themselves and usually end up burnt out in the process or selective to whom they give it too. These people are resented by society because then attention is given back to them in acknowledgement of their achievements in life by compliments or by other methods called self-satisfaction.

The attention resenter - they literally hate anyone gaining and giving the spotlight/limelight in that instance when your noticed. For they hate observing your actions and mannerisms because thats giving their attention away; even when from themselves towards another, they hate it because they feel you don't deserve it, as differences means attention is given because they noticed these differences eg. skin colour. they literally hate anyone gaining and giving the spotlight in that instance, including animals, in the familial setting, at social events, work environments, religion deities/spirits, celebs, that get the attention.

And also the person who resents 'attention' in any shape or form, including the 'time factor' and 'focus' because its gives and gains attention at its very core as a reality as well as a concept. And attention resenter person just can't bear to see it brought upon anything; newspapers, on blogs, social networking sites. And the attention resenter are destructive to those around them. These people are the extreme opposite to the attention-seeker but less documented because largely people view the resenter of attention within the disguise of being cynics, as its a mistaken belief that these are actions and attitudes of a jealous person, they are not, they are those from a attention resenter.

However, to most people generally, its never intentional in the setting out to gain attention to themselves or the things that they do, nor to any extreme degree (besides the attention seeker) but that of normality and how the world works, and the resenter of attentionalism lacks this basic understanding.

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Burning Energy Fast

May 11, 2011

LINK: "Maybe skinny isn't so good after all: If you burn energy fast, your life may be shorter" article in Daily Mail newspaper.

MY COMMENT:

I agree. "In a report in the Journal of Clinical Endocrinology and Metabolism, as Researcher Dr Reiner Jumpertz said: 'We found that higher endogenous (slimmer people) metabolic rate – which is how much energy the body uses for normal body functions – is a risk factor for earlier mortality."

And an interesting view from a reader comment; "Could it be because people who can eat what they like and don't put on weight do exactly that and eat rubbish food and are unhealthy because of it and die earlier?"

Home vs Personal Appearance

May 11, 2011

LINK: "Why middle-aged women care more about their home's appearance than their own looks" article in the Daily Mail newspaper.

MY COMMENT:

"Women like me know, because we are realistic, that we are no longer likely to garner compliments for the way we look. But, feeling the need for what psychologists might call ‘positive reinforcement’ now and again, for some reassurance that we can still cut it when it comes to style and aesthetics, our home becomes a cherished totem."

This was interesting.

Marriage is Blissful Boredom

May 11, 2011

LINK: "Passion? No, the secret of a happy marriage is blissful boredom" article in Daily Mail Newspaper.

MY COMMENT:

I agree with these reader comments and an extract from the article itself:

"Often people say they are bored with their partners as though they are some sort of court jesters there for their amusement - no, husbands and wives life partners, friends and lovers - boredom may come from the life circumstances of a dull job, paying the bills, emptying the rubbish - but you still have to do these even if you're single!"

Affable male + boring relationship = bliss.

"This article is so true and I've been saying the same thing for years - relationships are not for people who need constant thrills and excitements. To have a successful relationship you need to be with someone who you can be quite happy doing nothing with."

Boring male + boring relationship = contentment.

"‘Forget about igniting the flames! Flames are nasty, dangerous things that’ll burn your house down. Concentrate instead on those lovely cosy embers. Why don’t you just shove in a couple of potatoes and warm your hands at the coals?"

Crashing boring male + boring relationship = devotion.

Dissociative Amnesia

May 11, 2011

LINK: "Stress causes businessman's brain to 'blow a fuse' and wipes his entire memory" article in the Daily Mail NewspaperThe clinical depression I suffer from is: Dysthymia - a less intense type of depression that involves long-term, chronic symptoms that are less severe, but keep one from functioning at full ability and from feeling good. (Note: I'm trying to leave in certain places, that is on my blog, website, and here on facebook, certain things that might assist, then again might not. with realism and non-realism, rather than thinking of myself only, whilst I'm still going through day to day life in a self-centred way and unselfish manner).

MY COMMENT: Know the feeling. Happened to me in 1996. Patchy memory: lost about I think three months out of my life that was down to dissociative amnesia, and still can't recall anything from that period. Problem is that one then becomes vulnerable to other people's invention of what you were supposed to have done and been like, and the sorry thing is you have no recall to it, so can't refute it properly. Its a sad position to be in. And during this time in 1996 the doctor's at Maudsley Hospital didn't know what stressful event triggered mine, but diagnosed me with suffering from clinical depression thereafter.

About near-death experiences

May 11, 2011

LINK: "About near-death experiences" article in the Daily Mail newspaper

MY COMMENT:

Its nice to read peoples experiences and reader comments. Thank you. And I partially agree with this reader comment:

"The body is a combination two things, the physical tangible body and a much more refined body, the spirit body. The two are combined when we are living, and when we die the spirit leaves. The spirit can also leave at time of trauma and stress but will return. The two look the same but the spiritual body is the real you and cannot die."

Okay, from personal experience. When at secondary school, and asked what I was doing over the weekend, and I replied at home; and spent time in having an afternoon nap. I was then literally accosted by classmates whom stated that they'd see...n me walking down Brixton (Lambeth) High Street on that occasion and they were adament about it. Therefore, it can be proved, as out of the body experiences (of ones spiritual form) are sometimes witnessed by others only if they know you.

However, I disagree partly; the spiritual form of humans and animals can diminish in time if so decreed, but the essence of their soul is the central immortal part and returns to a state of hibernation, but not the high ranking elder deities, that's the difference between them.

Mantenatal classes

May 11, 2011

LINK: "Mantenatal classes, anyone? Dad launches men-only birth groups..." article in the Daily Mail newspaper. 

MY COMMENT:

I like the fact that its segregated.

Also I agree with these two reader comments:

"Regardless of how much understanding you believe a man can have of pregnancy and childbirth, anything that makes them feel more comfortable, confident, and involved will enable them to provide more relief for the mother and quicker bonding with the child, how could anyone be against that?"

and that of:

"There are lots of practical things that dads can learn in antenatal classes to help support their partners through labour and this can make labour more manageable and less medical. Finally, parents-to-be have less exposure to babies being born in the extended family so many parents-to-be need classes to help build confidence on parenting techniques and learn information that historically would have been learnt through experience."

Your Sleep Position

May 11, 2011

LINK: "Is the way you sleep making you ill?" article in the Daily Mail Newspaper

MY COMMENT:

Missed one out and confirmed by my doctor. When finding it hard to breathe, sleep at a 45 degree angle upright, as to alleviate pressure in the lungs. I did this on a sunlounger that could tilt when I had a nasty chest cold and found I could take in air better and get a good night sleep too.

Love Handles

May 11, 2011

LINK: "Why your love handles may be GOOD for you" article in the Daily Mail newspaper

MY COMMENT:

I agree with the reader comment in DM: "There's a lot of research available showing that carrying extra weight as you get older leads to longer life. Sadly in our society the ideal shape for older women is seen as the shape of a teenager. Many post menopausal women diet and exercise to get down to this size and shorten their life in the process..." And I'll add for me a healthy regime is better; keeping fit. From personal experience, with all my health conditions, I cried buckets at the thought of not being able to exercise to keep in shape, but have now managed to find alternatives. And the priority of looking after myself in how I present myself in 'appearance' is also good too in middle age for self-esteem, but I'll leave my youthful looking body behind in the past and am taking on a graceful looking one instead (admiring glances by men still occur, which means the effort is appreciated even if remaining single in status out of choice).

Intimacy Anorexia

May 11, 2011

LINK: "Is your partner cold" article in the Daily mail newspaper.

 

MY COMMENT:

 

Intimacy isn't about talking, its about actions being louder than words.

 

‎"WITHHOLDING EMOTIONS - This means having difficulty sharing feelings, refusing to talk about hopes and thoughts about the relationship." I disagree. As this is one of the problems of viewing a couple because it can also from what is said be used as controlling. Secondly, a partner isn't a psychotherapist and thereby shouldn't have to deal with such behaviour; leave that to the experts. And lastly, there are personal boundaries on emotions which is a choice on whether it is shared or not, and shouldn't be an issue thats 'forced' into the equation of having a relationship.

 

‎"MAINTAINING DISTANCE - Anger or silence to push away, punish or control the spouse. Some are able to go weeks without talking to their other half." I disagree. Keeping distance has to be seen in context to the relationship itself. Firstly having distance can mean a time of reflection which is construed wrongly which has nothing to do with the partner, who's taking every single bloodly thing personally. Also secondly, distance avoids confrontation until such a time when the subject on their minds can be approached then rationally to their partner; if there is a problem that needs to be addressed, which might be nothing other than should one hold off from purchasing a new car or save for that holiday.